It took me about three months to remember what my password was on here, but I finally remembered :-)

I really feel like I'm at a weird place in my life right now. I'm almost done with school and as I prepare to get an internship and walk across that stage with degree in hand I suddenly feel completely scared about life. I have been ready to graduate for two years, and now that it is almost here I am becoming interested in so many other fields that I would love to take courses in. I know this is probably a very common overwhelming feeling seniors get when they realize school is almost done and I have to grow up and get a big girl job and work 8-5 and start thinking about when to settle down and when to start a family....WOW that's a lot to think about! I can barely decide what I want to eat for dinner every night right now. The thought of getting married terrifies me at the moment. That's a big responsibility being a wife, one I'm not ready to tackle just yet.

People here at school have called me selfish for wanting to live out my dreams and work for a while before I get married, but I don't think it's selfish. Why would I want to be married if I felt like I had to...shouldn't a good marriage be started by both people WANTING to be married? I think marriage is pushed too hard in the South. When you get done with school people constantly ask you when are you getting married and it's expected of you here. People assume constantly just because Clay and I have been together for two years that we have our whole future planned out and we're going to get married the moment I am done with school...Well that's awesome if some people do that, but I prefer to be financially secure so I am going to go get my Masters then secure a job before the whole marriage thing.

Anyways, now that I have that marriage rant out of the way...I got a quote from a friend yesterday that blew my mind and I thought I'd share it with you. "God takes full responsibility for the life wholly devoted to Him." YEAH, I know. Think about that one for a while!

This weekend is the BCM Retreat. There is horrible weather right now, like tornadoes and hail storms. We might have to ride it out before we hit the road, cause I'm not driving a van full of college students in that kind of stuff.

Well I had a ton of things I was going to blog about today, but so many things have happened at work today and I have been writing this over a period of five hours, so I have forgotten all the wonderful things I had on my brain. Oh well

Leaving tomorrow

I leave for camp tomorrow afternoon and I wish I could say I was super excited and ready but as the day as gone by I have found myself very nervous and questioning what I'm doing. I know it's going to be a great summer, I just don't like the idea of not having that encouragement from my family every day since we can't have cell phones. I will definitely be getting back into the habit of letter writing this summer. Speaking of, my address down there is P.O. Box 165, Cook Springs AL. 35052 if you would like to write me sometime this summer. I am also nervous because I am having braces put on in the morining, top and bottom, and I know I am going to be in some pain for a few days so I'm scared I'll look like a sissy to everyone or something. I don't know, I think I'm blowing things out of porportion right now, but I can't sleep so I figured I would write about it.

On a side note I had a dream last night that the smurfs took over camp and were making all of us drink potion to turn us blue and shrink to 5 in tall. It was terrifying and I can never look at a blue smurf the same again.

Back to the camp subject, I feel like I need more time to prepare but at the same time I'm ready for it to start. I just want to be the best I can and I don't want to mess up. I want all my campers to like me and their camp trip be memorable....I think once I get past the first week I'll be fine, but for now I am nervous and scared and excited all wrapped up in the little box about to explode. I'll put some pictures on here of my cabin, but I can't put pictures up of the campers. It's a violation of federal protection laws for children under 18 (WOW I have no idea why I just said that much about why I couldn't post pictures, you probably knew that without me saying it)

Anyways, I am going to attempt sleep again now. Till next time

Movin on up

I love it when life is quiet for a while, when you actually have time to wake up and not jump out of bed to start the day. These last two weeks with no school have been a great way to transitions from school mode to camp counselor mode. I have to admit I'm nervous about being in charge of 12 little girls for 24 hours a day 5 days a week. I'm scared one of them is going to die while in my care, but I'm even more scared that I'm not going to know the answers to hard questions they are going to ask me about life. This year our theme at camp is ENOUGH. We are teaching the girls that who they are is enough for Christ to use and he is enough to supply every need for them. I know girls, especially their age, battle with self image all the time, and I can't wait to show them through scripture, that they are beautiful not because of their outer beauty, but because they are daughters of the most high King, which is the best kind of beautiful anyone could ever be. The journey to prepare myself spiritually for this summer has been bitter sweet. I've had to come face to face with a lot of issue I shoved in the closet for a long time and give them over to God, but it's so freeing to absolutely let go of your life and let Him take control. I have already met about half the girls I will be on staff with at WorldSong and they are some pretty incredible people! I can't wait to get to know them more during our training week.
I'm going to try and update this on the weekends, since I can't put pictures up of the girls due to privacy laws I want people to be able to experience camp as best as possible.
Leaving for the beach in the morning and can't wait to relax for another week before heading off to camp for the summer.

Did that really happen?

I've been 21 for a week now....why don't I feel different? I thought this was going to be a life changing event for me! I'm a tad disappointed in you 21. I was ready for newness.

Dear Dr. Robertson

Thanks for making college life less enjoyable! The busy work you give us every week and your impossibly hard tests are the lowest parts of my days. I can't tell you how much I love working on your ten page paper and thirty slide power point. And then this morning you announce we are having a comprehensive final on 13 chapters. Can't wait to study for that! You're the kinda teacher that college students shoot burning rage of hate at with their eyes.

I'm going to die before finals are over because of this professor. Most ridiculous expectations ever in the history of my college career.

Sticks and stones

I had a revelation today! Whoever came up with the famous phrase "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me" must have been a deaf man. I'm so glad that I don't have a temper problem because after last week you would have seen me on your local news channel beating the crap out of some people. I love the fact that God is a comforter to the hurting and he dries the tears of the broken!

Updating from work

I am taking a break from my very busy week to escape from my responsibilities for just a bit. I have been looking at several blogs this morning and I need to know how to operate this whole blog shin-dig. I have seen some very cool ones, and I need to get my profiles looking like some of those. Any who, I have had so much on my mind today! David, who is my campus minister here at UNA, is having his fourth child today (well I guess technically his wife Hannah would be producing the baby). It's going to be a boy and they haven't decided on Joseph Allen Sumner or Jacob Allen Sumner yet. I also have four more tests this week, along with two papers and tutoring some high school kids. This Saturday is our garage sale at the BCM (Baptist Campus Ministry) and we are trying to set up for that. I will be gone though on Saturday to Montgomery. I have my interview for a summer missions camp counselor position at Worldsong Camp, in Cook Springs Alabama.
The main thing that has been on my mind today though is a commercial I saw on TV last night. It was a Cover Girl commercial with Ellen DeGeneres at the spokesperson. I will put a link to the video at the bottom of the page. The first lines of the commercial "Inner beauty is important, but not nearly as important as outer beauty!" I couldn't believe it. I sent an e-mail to Cover Girl and the Ellen DeGeneres show telling them how harmful this commercial could be in the influence of our young girls. I plan on calling a representative from Cover Girl advertising later this week to express my opinion to her as well. I was really disturbed by this and I think it's important that Hollywood understands what sort of impact they have on these naive young women they are trying to solicit their products to.
So anyways, that's what is new in the life of Elise today. Hope you have a fabulous rest of the day and stay warm!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aL-C58XlHPc